Home
Subscribe
About
Us
Features
News
Album
Reviews
Movies
Concert
Reviews
Top
10
Resources
Contact
Us
|
Black
Christmas: A Johnny Cash Inspired Adaptation of T'was the Night Before
Christmas
by psychologist Dr. Bruce
L. Thiessen, aka, Dr. B.L.T.
T'was the night before Christmas
and all through the street
the people were searchin'
for somethin' to eat
their stockings were torn
and their bodies were worn
tired and sickly, unkempt
and forlorn
a man called St. Nicholas
was dealin' cocaine
it was all the street doctor
could offer for pain
the anguish I saw on their
faces that night
told a tale of incredible
horror and frieght
t'was the night before New
Year
and where was Dick Clark?
when the sirens followed
a shot in the dark
the shooters were shot in
return, and they fled
' heard their uncle's on
crack
and their auntie's on reds
and Donner and Blitzen were
just pimps that she fed
while she still was alive,
now she's turned up for dead
on Bakersfield streets, like
the ones Buck sang of
we could all use some joy,
we could all use some love
and beyond this hick town
out to Tollbooth's grand fans
let me say, "Spread good
tidings all throughout this fine land."
though the joyful White
Christmas that we all used to know
is just powder to some that
they stuff in their nose
let's all draw from the
Christ child, a message that grows
every time that it's written,
and each time that it's told
Though Bing sang of White
Christmas, Cash would always wear black
and on Christmas his sleigh
was the place where he stashed
compassion for beggars,
and hookers and thieves
he replaced hopelessness
with a word called "believe"
so this night, before Christmas
let's remember his life
and apply his black Christmas
to the sorrow and strife
just for Johnny, let's visit
a prison or two
and sing carols to inmates
just like Johnny would do
reach out to the poor, and
downtrodden this year
as you spread Cash's tidings
of comfort and cheer
Merry Christmas!
Dr. BLT
|