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Audiences have a rare opportunity this season to see two movies that are diametrically opposed to each other. Love, Actually embodies the feel-good Christmas film, with over 20 different people looking for (and mostly finding) love in the holidays. Bad Santa is a vicious rejoinder to that kind of movie, where the holiday season is merely an excuse for man to be even crueler to his fellow man. Though both movies have their moments, they're both undermined by these very basic qualities.

Love, Actually brings a star-studded cast of familiar favorites and up-and-comers. Alan Rickman and Emma Thompson are a married couple settling into the banal middle years, when children become the primary reason to stick together. And into Rickman's life comes a hot-to-trot secretary who'd love to work some overtime, if you know what I mean. Liam Neeson is a man who's just lost his wife to a dreadful disease and must now look after his young son, but the boy (in a delightful performance from Thomas Sangster) is pining more for an unattainable 10-year-old classmate than for his mum. Hugh Grant plays a new and single prime minister, who discovers that finding a date for Christmas might be the hardest part of his new position. Then there's Laura Linney and Rodrigo Santoro, two love-struck co-workers who can't get up the courage to ask each other out; a newly married couple played by Chiwetel Ejiofor and rising star Keira Knightley along with third wheel Andrew Lincoln; recently divorced Colin Firth and his Portuguese housekeeper (Lucia Moniz); a pair of movie stand-ins (Martin Freeman and Joanna Page) who get to know each other during several scenes of simulated sex; a washed-up singer (Bill Nighy) in search of a comeback; and a randy Brit named Colin (Kris Marshall) who thinks that the dating grass is much greener on the American side. This list doesn't even include a wonderful cameo by Rowan Atkinson or an arrogant U.S. president played by Billy Bob Thornton.

As you can imagine, writer and director Richard Curtis (screenwriter for Four Weddings and a Funeral, among many other romantic comedies) has a difficult time keeping all of his storylines moving forward. Still, the first two-thirds of the film is delightful. The cast is uniformly charming, and their struggles and successes in love are a joy to watch. I'm still a sucker for Hugh Grant's bumbling Englishman, Alan Rickman's devilish smile, Emma Thompson's integrity, and Colin Firth's upstanding nature. But I also need to add in Keira Knightley's brilliant smile, Bill Nighy's hilarious smarminess, and Rowan Atkinson's subtle twist on his own brand of humor

It's especially impressive that the movie doesn't always overwhelm us with saccharine. The movie is forthright about the pains of love: the heartbreaking crush that cannot be returned, the horror of finding out your spouse might be cheating on you, the deep hurt of loss. Yes, it's a Christmas movie, with pageants, snow, and heart-thumping revelations, but not everything turns out perfectly in the end.

Nothing is perfect--or even close to it--in Bad Santa. Billy Bob Thornton is Willie, an obnoxious drunk who works six weeks out of the year as a Santa at some department store. His partner is Marcus (Tony Cox), a black dwarf who acts as an elf as well as Willie's manager. The two only need to work six weeks a year because they end each holiday by robbing the store's safe and living off that until the next season rolls around. Willie keeps saying he's going to retire and go straight, but he always ends up needing the money. The two have arrived in Phoenix, ready to fleece another mall. But Willie has become even more belligerent than usual, and it's all Marcus can do to keep him in line.

Billy Bob Thornton is brilliant in this take-no-prisoners role. His way with a swear word--which is pretty much 60% of his dialogue--rivals that of his co-star Bernie Mac (unfortunately under-utilized in this role). Thornton absolutely refuses to wink at the audience or offer any hope of redemption, and his scene when he destroys the store's reindeer is priceless.

The film, directed by hipster fave Terry Zwigoff (Ghost World), is a crude middle finger to every Christmas movie you can imagine. It sends up various yuletide traditions, including advent calendars, Christmas eve celebrations and, of course, Santa himself. It also scoffs at Hollywood's need for a happy ending. Just when you think the movie's going to make a right turn toward redemption, Willie does something even more despicable. He has sex with fat women in the dressing rooms, he comes on to an underage girl in the arcade, he yells obscenities in the food court. And when he takes advantage of an eight-year-old boy, who's kinda slow, and his senile grandmother, Willie has truly descended into the pit of depravity.

The first half of Bad Santa is one hilarious moment after another, but that kind of crassness wears on you after a while. How often can we laugh at Santa soiling himself, Santa using the "f" word, or Santa having sex in various public places? After a while, the whole enterprise feels dirty. You have to be pretty cynical to follow this Santa to the end of the ride. And then the movie stops the sleigh before the bitter end, a rather cynical ploy to have it both ways.

Love, Actually could use a little more cynicism, unfortunately. While not every character finds a happy ending, enough do that we start to wish Willie might come rob these folk as well. Love, Actually is a great date movie but one that might irritate the single folk. Bad Santa is a hilarious attack on our Christmas conventions but one that will wear out the welcome of all but the most jaded. Which category fits you best will determine which movie you enjoy more.    

J. Robert Parks  1/17/2004

Love, Actually:  
Bad Santa: